You want it, but it’s just not on your partner’s radar. It’s really not uncommon, and it’s a commonly recurring chat topic on forums like Fetlife: I got married two years ago, and while we’ve been together I’ve suppressed my urge to be submissive due to him being mostly vanilla. He says he wants to…
Tag: desires
YKINMKBYKIOK – Your Kink is Not My Kink, But Your Kink is OK
YKINMKBYKIOK is such a mouthful of an initialism that it’s commonly shortened to YKIOK (or sometimes YKINMK). It represents “your kink is not my kink, but your kink is OK”. It isn’t a foreign concept outside of kink circles. You’ll have heard it as “horses for courses”, “whatever floats your boat”, “different strokes for different…
What’s the Difference Between Kink and Fetish?
Erotic is using a feather. Kinky is using the whole chicken. A few decades ago, those into BDSM or leather/latex, or many of our other pleasures, would have been described as “fetishists”. Now we tend to go with “kinksters”. It’s an example of linguistic fashion, but in this case it’s also more accurate. Even though…
Submissive Worksheet – Needs and Wants (long)
by blessingb Note: My writing reflects my relationship – female submissive / male Dominant. I recognise there are other equally valid relationships in our world. As the title suggests, this is a long article detailing a process I hope you’ll find helpful. If you prefer to do it in your own time offline, you can…
Which Shade of BDSM Will Set You Free?
by Becca (shadows-dance) I think every person’s kink is unique. Now let me explain myself. 🙂 I think of “kink” as a giant box of Crayolas. We all get one the second we decide that “vanilla” isn’t what we want. Sure, there’s a white crayon in the box, but it’s not our favorite. BDSM encompasses…