The problem with terms like “sub” or “slave” is that they’re broad umbrella terms. Perhaps you see your role (or would like your role) to be partly domestic helper, partly pet, partly pleasure toy. Or perhaps something else? What type of submissive are you? This test utilizes the 11 categories of submissive from “Domination &…
Same But Different – SSC versus RACK in BDSM
THE BEAUTY OF RISK AWARE CONSENSUAL KINK AND THE SAFE EXPERIMENT OF SAFE, SANE AND CONSENSUAL Since 1983, SSC or Safe Sane Consensual has been the mantra of the BDSM community. On any online forum, the mere mention of any activity that involved suspending the safeword or roleplaying a non-consensual scene (rape and interrogation fantasies…
Doms – Why We Do The Things We Do
There is a romantic image of the Domly Dom, on his throne, with his scantily dressed and collared slave at his feet. At the snap of a finger, food and wine are brought forth, and if he grows bored the slave performs a slow and sensual disrobe and perhaps begins worshiping his Master’s feet with…
Panic Attacks, BPD, Depression – Are They Mental Disorders or Signs You Need To Deal With The Past?
Why is it that we tag a person with extreme pessimism as having mental illness (borderline personality disorder, depression etc) but extreme optimism is seen as healthy? There are very few instances where “being up” is examined at all, except perhaps where it is the “manic” part of manic depressive. An interesting alternative view comes…
A Dom’s Guide to Panic Attacks and BDSM (by a humble hungry sub)
WHAT IS PANIC ATTACK? The non-profit resource site HelpGuide.org offers this definition: “A panic attack is a sudden surge of overwhelming anxiety and fear. Your heart pounds and you can’t breathe. You may even feel like you’re dying or going crazy. Left untreated, panic attacks can lead to panic disorder and other problems. They may…
Peter Pan Syndrome – Real or an Aspect of Ageplay?
In the age play community, quite a number of guys refer to themselves as having Peter Pan Syndrome (PPS). It’s common to see it on FetLife profiles, and it’s often used in the way of saying “age play is not fake to me, I really have this inside me”. The name, of course, refers to…
BDSM – Sexual Orientation or Just Good Clean Dirty Fun?
Jillian Keenan is a brilliant writer at Slate. Check out her work here. In an article We’re Kinky, Not Crazy, she opens by saying: The American Psychiatric Association has decided that people with kinky sexual interests (which—let’s just get this out of the way—includes me) don’t necessarily have mental disorders. That seems like good news,…
BPD – Is It A Disorder, And Is There A Cure?
MY OPINION ON THE LABELLING OF BPD AS A “DISORDER” Whether borderline personality disorder (BPD) originates from nature or nurture is constantly being debated. Personally, i disagree that BPD is a form of disorder. There is an underlying problem in judging a person who uses a very different lens to view the world as having…
What Puts The “Complex” in Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD)?
WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN C-PTSD AND PTSD? Rather than try to explain this myself, i want to share this from the Out of the Fog website, which i think explains it well: Although similar, Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD) differs slightly from the more commonly understood and diagnosed condition Post Traumatic Stress Disorder…
Where Is The Signboard That Leads Out Of Depression?
Walking out from the dark cloud wasn’t easy and never will be easy. There is no significant signboard showing your way out, and there are useless signboards everywhere, showing you the direction to another dark cloud. Where is the signboard? The one that doesn’t cheat you and truly shows you the way out to the…