That feeling of being “Dommy” or “subby” (or more accurately Topspace, or subspace), doesn’t always come from diving right in. It’s nearly always a process of going deeper and deeper. Entering spaces can be similar to performing on stage. You’ve often read the script many times, and finally the time comes and the spotlight falls…
Survival Tips for Polyamorous D/s Relationships
From childhood, we learn that a normal family consists of one male and one female. With the recent welcome wave of gay marriage rights across the globe, hopefully the next generation will not see that gender mix norm. The couple fall in love and share a life, perhaps with a child or two. Often the…
Why Your Non-Verbal Communication Isn’t As Good As You Think It Is
My friend Ramesh is naturally gregarious and something of a clown. He went to his first munch a couple of years ago and tried to be on his best behaviour, introducing himself to others and joining the conversations in the smaller groups. When I asked him afterwards how it had gone, he said it was…
Overcoming Limits of D/s in Long Distance Relationships
The languid Dom in a silky robe leans back in his comfortable chair, takes a sip from him coffee and draws on his cigarette. His naked and collared sub moves forward from his kneeling position to take the cup, then backs away and hurries to the kitchen to refresh it. What we have in that…
Illustrated Guide – Pet Play Ears
We’ve reblogged this illustration from Boyfriend and ExBoyfriend BDSM Gallery. He’s got great taste in NSFW pics too. This is a regular series of illustrated guides. You can find the others here. animal play: (see pet play, ponygirl , ponyboy, pup-play) The sub behaves and/or dresses like an animal. The principal theme of animal role…
The Work of Ownership: When Fantasy Meets Reality
Come here. Kneel down. Do as you’re told. Three simple commands. At first glance, they seem almost too simple, too easy, and too basic to have any meaning. Where is the strict command? Where is the humiliation? Where is the slapping around, smashing his face into the carpet, and verbally abusing the piss out of…
Chastity – Does Ejaculation Reduce the Risk of Prostate Cancer?
We posted a urologist’s advice on prolonged chastity and whether or not prostate milking is necessary a while ago. A 2004 study found that the more often men ejaculated, the less likely they were to get cancer, while some things should be avoided. The sample of this study (with many participants under 50 years old)…
Assent Matters
by SherynB Okay, there’s a 600lb gorilla in the room, and I’m done pretending it’s not there. What we do isn’t pretty or politically correct, and frankly, it’s dangerous if we can’t get (and stay) honest about the reality of it. So here it is as raw and real and un-PC as it is: There…
When Sadists Go Wild – Berserking and a Different Kind of Top Frenzy
Berserk: Injuriously, maniacally, or furiously violent or out of control Wiktionary Top frenzy (or Dom frenzy) usually describes that initial time of discovery of BDSM encounters, where the excitement of newly discovered pleasures leads to an “anywhere, anytime, anyone” mania. If you’re on any cruising site you’ll find plenty of it going around, along with…
Physical and Mental Techniques for Processing Pain
We spend a lot of time talking about pain and pleasure in the BDSM community. It’s a very individual thing, and we all have our own preferred levels, and our different responses to pain during a session. Athletes often have their own way of processing challenges to sustain themselves till the final line, and in…