Everyday life can get a bit mundane and humdrum. Stuff that used to give us challenge or put a spark in our day gets repeated over and over again, and becomes less interesting. It happens in relationships too. One technique to give you a tingle throughout the day is to add a secret. A layer…
Category: Power Exchange (TPE/TAT)
Free Will and BDSM
We have free will if we have the autonomous power to make decisions about our own direction in life and act on them. Whether we really have free will or not has been debated since the great philosophers, and is still debated now. ABOUT FREE WILL Social dynamics are complex, and we are the product…
Are BDSM slaves Individuals, or Just Robots to Serve?
There is a general concept of BDSM slaves as someone who gives up their pride and identity, and focuses on their Master. The purpose of the slave, in this concept, is to serve. This is the type of slave referred to in the principles of Internal Enslavement. But actually, in the BDSM community, there is…
The Relationship Between BDSM and Ancient Tantra
By Dr. Michael Dean Goodman (Maheshvara) This is a fascinating topic – one that I’ve spent years exploring. I had the great good fortune to spend years living with, and to be trained and initiated by, a renowned Indian yogic/tantric master – who sent me out to share what I’d gained. I teach tantra workshops…
Safewords Aren’t About Trust or Love
We’ve talked about SSC vs RACK and Consensual Non-Consent (CNC), but what is the actual function of a safeword in BDSM practices and how important is it that you have one? If we frame a discussion in the terms of SSC (Safe, Sane and Consensual), the safeword gives the ultimate power in a scene to…
Consensual Non-Consent (CNC)
The two basic negotiation concepts used in the BDSM community are SSC (Safe, Sane and Consensual) and RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink). An extension of these concepts is consensual non-consent. CONSENSUAL NON-CONSENSUALITY A mutual agreement that within defined limits, or subject to a safe word or other restrictions, and to common sense, consent to activities…
The Psychology of BDSM
by bruce On Saturday evening, after a workshop on the ‘Psychology of BDSM’ was over, I was walking home wondering to myself what really motivated me to pursue BDSM. While the evening started out well, and proved to be interesting by itself, I got the feeling that, by the end of the talk, few panelists…
Submissive Journals as a Tool for Developing BDSM Relationships
You don’t just switch power exchange (TPE) relationships on like a tap, you grow them. To do that, communication is key, and journals are one way to help that information flow. One of the most common reasons for subs to keep a journal is to give their Dom access to their thoughts and feelings, but…
Ageing Bottoms and the Gay BDSM Community
by Bob Buckley It is (or can be) very nice to have friends. But, sometimes, they do make simple suggestions. This paper came about from the simple suggestion of Daddy Bob (Los Angeles) that I write about the ageing bottom, and from the equally simple suggestion of Doc (Dallas) that I write about the ageing…
Hot Times 24/7 – Our Fairytale BDSM Lifestyle
i identify as a slaveboy which, as you know, means I have no identity, live in a cage, eat pain like chocolates and spend my time either having sex or waiting lasciviously on my Master summoning me to use (hopefully for sex). Obviously we have hot sex pretty much every minute of every day. It’s…