Sacred places are awe-inspiring; they are serene environments that encourage contemplation and meditation; and they create an attitude of respect Daniel Levi and Sara Kocher In BDSM, we experience sacred moments not between the individual and God, but between individuals. It’s nothing abstract or intangible. It’s the foot of your Master and the forehead of…
Category: Identities
Are All Sadists Safe, Sane and Consensual?
The short answer to whether all Sadists are safe, sane and consensual is… no. A Sadist enjoys inflicting physical or emotional pain or discomfort. His partner being a masochist may affect his pleasure, or it may not. There is actually a wide spectrum of Sadists, from those who are skilled pain inflictors but can take…
Erotic Humiliation and Degradation
Technically speaking, erotic humiliation and erotic degradation are not quite the same thing, though they are often spoken about interchangably or lumped together as “humilation and degradation”. Humiliation is a mental state, and what humiliates one person may not humiliate another. For example, telling a man he has a small penis may be humiliating, if…
No Sex Please, Just The Kink
If you’re on online cruising and dating sites, like Collarspace, Tinder and Recon, you’d be forgiven for thinking that BDSM is just the kinky spice that’s sprinkled on top of sex. Whether you’re Top or bottom, if you stray from the prescribed script about being a nympho/stud with a “do anything” attitude, you can find…
BDSM and the Pursuit of Happiness
Even though a recent Guardian article, Never tried BDSM? Go on, it’s good for you, points to studies that suggest that those of us expressing ourselves sexually may be happier than the average, there are a lot of people who are “under happy”. I’m using the term “under happy”, rather than “unhappy”, because I think…
What is Sensual Domination?
There are a lot of BDSM sub-communities that use the Domly Dom Dom as their archetype. Internal Enslavement, the B.E.S.T Training group, and many Master and Slave groups on FetLife, are examples. The Dom is a controller, an authority figure and a leather-clad alpha. There’s nothing wrong with that. Those Doms certainly exist in abundance….
Aces Are High – Asexuality and Demisexuality
WHAT IS ASEXUAL? An asexual is someone who has little or no sexual attraction to others. It’s not the same as abstaining from sexual activity or celibacy. But, like “BDSM”, “asexual” is a big umbrella term that encompasses a range of different levels of attraction. The most common use of the term is for individuals…
The History (and Controversial Psychology) of Sadomasochism
The two words incorporated into this compound, “sadism” and “masochism,” were originally derived from the names of two authors. The term “Sadism” is derived from the name of Marquis de Sade. Not only did he practice sexual sadism, he also wrote novels about these practices (best known is Justine ). The term “Masochism” was named…
The Sensual submissive in BDSM Relationships
The journey of being a sub or slave to a Master is more than just passive obedience. You’ll hear lots of advice, like “always be obedient” and “never say no”, but it takes something more to build the foundations of a 24/7 lifestyle relationship that will last. Like anything, BDSM relationships burn out. The thrill…
Leather Behaviour
By George Whiting “The term ‘Leather’ embraces a whole lot of fetishes, fantasies and lifestyles; leather, rubber, boots, uniforms, BDSM etc. As we talk about leather, we remember that it is an inclusive term and that, in its diversity, there is a common thread. Simply explained, that common factor lies in the realization of personal…