When the submissive or slave has PTSD or Panic Attacks

This is part 2 of a 2 part article on PTSD and panic attacks. Part 1: 2 Ways to Deal with PTSD and Panic Attacks Part 3: When the Dominant or Master has PTSD or Panic Attacks You might also like a previous article on this site, A Dom’s Guide to Panic Attacks and BDSM…

Illustrated Guide – Body Writing Tools

We’ve reblogged this illustration from Boyfriend and ExBoyfriend BDSM Gallery. He’s got great taste in NSFW pics too. This is a regular series of illustrated guides. You can find the others here. Although the 1996 Peter Greenaway film The Pillow Book was an erotic and poetic look at body writing, in BDSM it is usually…

Do People Get Involved in BDSM Because They’re Broken?

It’s a commonly held opinion that a lot of people become involved in BDSM or an M/s or D/s lifestyle because they are mentally unstable, broken or are working through childhood trauma. Not just by people outside the community who “don’t know any better”, but by people who are actually involved in BDSM, M/s and…

Illustrated Guide – Pet Play Tailplugs

We’ve reblogged this illustration from Boyfriend and ExBoyfriend BDSM Gallery. He’s got great taste in NSFW pics too. This is a regular series of illustrated guides. You can find the others here. animal play: (see pet play, ponygirl , ponyboy, pup-play) The sub behaves and/or dresses like an animal. The principal theme of animal role…

Can Role-Play Add to the Pleasure That Pain Brings?

What’s in your sadomasochist (S/m) repertoire? If you think of role-play as “I’m the stern headmaster and you’re the naughty student” then some people enjoy that kind of play and some people don’t find much in it. In this context we’re talking about role-play as making up fictional characters or putting ourselves as real characters…

Brats, SAMs and Break-mes

Brats are possibly something of a misunderstood species. They get a bad rap by many in the community who immediately associate the role with “petulant child”. But is that really what a brat is? We’d call a child a brat if they’re misbehaving, but most submissives who identify as brats see it as a role…

Edging and Orgasm Control

Erotic sexual denial is a sexual practice in which a heightened state of sexual arousal is maintained for an extended length of time without orgasm. Commonly, most of us would probably call it “orgasm control”. For some, it’s a common part of a BDSM or sexual bondage scene. It can be short term or long term….

Your Kink is OK in DSM-5

The American Psychiatric Association depathologized sadism, masochism, cross-dressing and fetishes in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5) in 2013. The DSM-5 defines paraphilia as “any intense and persistent sexual interest other than sexual interest in genital stimulation or preparatory fondling.” A paraphilic disorder is a “paraphilia that is currently causing…

Illustrated Guide – Hand Signals

We’ve reblogged this illustration from Boyfriend and ExBoyfriend BDSM Gallery. He’s got great taste in NSFW pics too. This is a regular series of illustrated guides. You can find the others here. Some Doms use a standard set of hand signals in their training, but they vary from Dom to Dom and House to House….

Considering a Poly Relationship? Ask Yourself These Questions First

We’ve extracted this self-evaluation exercise from the book Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships by Tristan Taormino. It’s a fantastic book, available on Amazon, and a must-read if you’re considering non-monogamy (in any of its many forms). Scroll to the end of the questions for a lot more information about the…