Our terms for things can be a bit clumsy, and there are actually two ways you could use the term “Top Drop” or “Dom Drop”. There’s no right or wrong way, and both would work within their context. IS THERE REALLY SUCH A THING AS TOP SPACE OR DOMSPACE? One way to talk about Top…
Category: Dominance
The Inner Selves of the Dominant and submissive in D/s Relationships
The magical thrill of the Dominant/submissive commitment is what most kinksters strive for. Not only because of the erotic ambiance that it provides, but there is something visceral about it. When we think of D/s, it can make our heart buzz and give us goosebumps. What really goes on between the stern standing Dominant and…
Quiz: Does Your Enneagram Personality Affect Who You Are In Your D/s Role?
Based on the work started in the 1960s and 70s by South American human potential psychiatrists Oscar Ichazo and Claudio Naranjo, the Enneagram of Personality (Enneagram) is a typology of nine interconnected personality types. It’s said to date back to knowledge from 4th century Alexandria. By being aware of what enneagram personality type we are,…
How To Use (And Not Use) Intermittent Reinforcement in Behaviour Modification
Go into any casino and you’ll see rows of people emptying their purse into slot machines, spurred on by random small wins. Or, if you’re not a gambler, think about the term “addicted to internet porn”. We scroll pages of images or click hundreds of videos, and most aren’t what we’re looking for, but every…
Download a Free Editable Sissy Maid Contract
In the U.S., BDSM history is richly steeped in leather culture and the stories of returning WWII veterans and motorcycle clubs. Parts of the community, including Sissy Maids, get overlooked in these stories, yet they have a rich, and better documented, history in Europe. We’ve had quite a number of queries for a Sissy Maid…
Can Role-Play Add to the Pleasure That Pain Brings?
What’s in your sadomasochist (S/m) repertoire? If you think of role-play as “I’m the stern headmaster and you’re the naughty student” then some people enjoy that kind of play and some people don’t find much in it. In this context we’re talking about role-play as making up fictional characters or putting ourselves as real characters…
Brats, SAMs and Break-mes
Brats are possibly something of a misunderstood species. They get a bad rap by many in the community who immediately associate the role with “petulant child”. But is that really what a brat is? We’d call a child a brat if they’re misbehaving, but most submissives who identify as brats see it as a role…
Illustrated Guide – Hand Signals
We’ve reblogged this illustration from Boyfriend and ExBoyfriend BDSM Gallery. He’s got great taste in NSFW pics too. This is a regular series of illustrated guides. You can find the others here. Some Doms use a standard set of hand signals in their training, but they vary from Dom to Dom and House to House….
A Letter to a Younger Me – and Any Other Young Doms
by SimonShroud I have been in the D/s lifestyle for coming up on a decade. So much has changed in me during that time. I wish that I could go back ten years and sit down with my younger self and have a little chat about what it means to be a Dominant. I did…
Ditch the Ego and Learn Some BDSM Skills
by Bob Buckley In gay male BDSM, the possession of an ego on the part of the topman (or bottom) is not a bad thing in itself – depending on just what type of ego it is. Anyone who has discussed BDSM with me, at any length, almost certainly will have heard me say that…